How Fast it Turns

Left: Tuul on Nov. 10; Right: Tuul on Nov 24.

I can't seem to let go of this obsession with cold yet. I have more to say. Many of my international teaching co-workers are beginning to job hunt for where to go next in the world. Many of them wish to go some place warmer and with less or no pollution. I certainly understand the desire for cleaner air. That's something that most Americans take for granted--not realizing how in many places around the world there is "bad air." That said and while I am not job hunting like my colleagues, I do ponder the places they seek. To me living in a tropical place--filled with humidity and (probably) mold and creepy crawlies and insects--has no appeal whatsoever. 

This reminds me of a vacation I took in 2009 with my cousin Melaney and her family. We spent a week in Costa Rica. I learned an important thing about myself on that trip--I am NOT a beach vacation person. I do not want to spend hours sitting on a beach--watching the surf, reading a book--nope, that is a certain kind of discomfort for me and not at all relaxing. I get that it IS bliss for many (said cousin and family are total water/beach people) and I do not begrudge them that pleasure; however, knowing what works for me and what doesn't is important. For me, I want to see sites--historical, cultural, natural--it doesn't matter. 

Today we were off the charts with our air quality--in the hazardous range for most of the day. One of the other features of the app I mentioned in my last post is that it lists rankings of the most polluted places on earth on any given day. Above is a screenshot from a few days ago. Ulaanbaatar was #9 on that day. Currently, as I finally finish typing up this post we are #6. Just today I switched over into a new face mask (picture below). I use the 3M disposable kind and wear each one for 2-4 weeks, depending on frequency and duration. You might be interested to read about tests conducted to determine if face masks really work. 

Top: Used @ 4 weeks off and on; Bottom: New

Inside my apartment I have some makeshift air purifiers created by SmartAir--a non-profit organization that began in China (Beijing) but has expanded to Mongolia. I have a Cannon in the living room and a DIY in both bedrooms. The HEPA filters go black within 1-2 weeks, but work for up to 1000 hours of usage. I believe they make a difference and are more affordable then commercial ones on the market. 

Honestly, the next 21 days are the hardest. The darkness is what bothers me the most. I count down to December 20th or so because then we begin to climb out of the darkness. Yep, beginning with December 22nd the days begin to get longer. 

With those tidbits of information, I'll sign off for now. Happy almost December to everyone!

Additional Notes on Cold (& Pollution)

Flowers require insulation for transport!

The thing I find challenging about living in this harsh winter climate is deciding how to dress for evening events. The school day is easy, I wear whatever I want to work (usually regular trousers and either a blouse or sweater) and then I throw on what Michiganders would call snow pants, but what I've grown to call "outer pants" as we really get less snow here in UB. By the time December arrives, it is often too cold for precipitation. So this outer shell simply protects against the cold I encounter briefly in the morning when I leave the apartment and get into our hired car, and again protects me after school when I walk to the bus stop and ride it home. 

The hard part is attending a dinner with family or friends, or going to a performance or evening event. It's not so easy to de-robe outer pants in those situations/places. Then one is left to calculate how late one will be exposed to the elements and for how long. Will walking be involved? Public transport or taxis? Will it only be 0 at 11 pm, or will it be -20? Most Mongolians I know spend their entire day wearing two layers--some sort of long underwear or leggings underneath their pants. I can do this if/when I'm going to be in the outdoors for an extended period of time, but I am NOT comfortable to wear them inside. I get too hot and don't like the extra layer. But to lose that layer, one has to find a restroom or changing room, take most everything off and then put back on the other layer. Then before you depart, the process must be repeated in reverse. This is TOO MUCH for me. The middle ground? Well, if I can't wear the easy outer pants, and I know I will be INSIDE for a couple or more hours, then I usually pair my LONG Eddie Bauer coat (Thanks Elaine!) which goes down to my calves, with TALL wool socks that go at least to my knee, or sometimes the mid thigh ones. These are easier to take off and NOT wear at the event. The coat is hung at coat check. I can be comfortable for a few hours and then pretty comfortable going home with those items on.

As we were walking to our evening dinner plans this past Friday I was a little shocked at the sight passing me on the street. It was 0 degrees Fahrenheit or -18 Celsius. As I crossed a major intersection, I passed four or five Mongolians--I would estimate in their early 20s--and each of them was sucking on a Popsicle!!! No Joke! Mongolians LOVE their ice cream and eat it all year round. I'm more of a seasonal ice cream enthusiast--mostly summer time qualifies. But then I also can't eat steaming soup in the summer while Zorig prefers it all year round. 

As I finish this post (I've been adding to it over a few days) on Thursday, November 23rd, it is Thanksgiving. The American Wives Club is gathering tonight to share a real and true American-style Thanksgiving meal. There will be nearly 30 of us in attendance. The seven of us and as many husbands and children as possible. This is the first time we've done something like this and it will be after a full day of work for most of us--it is NOT a holiday in Mongolia and the fact that I work at the American School of UB doesn't matter. 

The pollution this morning is also, perhaps, the worst I've seen it yet this season. I've discovered this new app (airvisual, featured here) for air pollution that shows a man's face adorned with the appropriate level of mask required to address the pollution level. The really unsettling thing about Ulaanbaatar is that you can have a huge diversity of readings throughout the city. This first image shows the airport (Nisekh) in purple and MNB which I have no idea what it stands for but I can tell you it is closer to my school, near Zaisan area of the city. 

But now I will also add this image (right) that shows the air as "good" at Misheel Expo which is basically UB's version of Furniture Row, though it's all housed in one HUGE warehouse. Below that is Zuun Ail which is the district of the city where one can buy home improvement and renovation items. That's north of the US Embassy (which is the RED reading just above). I appreciate the color coding--I believe it goes from Green-->Yellow-->Orange-->Red-->Brown. 

Okay, enough of this pollution talk! Hope this post finds you doing well and enjoying your Turkey Day with great food, football, and family and/or friends. I'll be watching all your posts of DELICIOUSNESS.

Winter has Descended

Winter has descended upon UB. I believe that ice began to form on the Tuul River about two weeks ago. I shot this picture yesterday on my walk home after work. You can see the ice is inching it's way across the width of the channel. It won't be long before one can walk across it. It was about 18 degrees Fahrenheit for the walk. But I was in the mood for one. It occurred to me on that walk that I do feel comfortable and at home in this cold and sometimes brutal landscape. I have visited warm places and I do not feel similarly about them. I remember reading Per Petterson's Out Stealing Horses a few years back--it was a book club selection--and I loved the sense of place in it. It took place in Norway. Even in books, the cold speaks to me. I did not know this about myself before living in Mongolia. 

On my previous post I forgot one very important habit--wearing clothes more than once before washing. In fact, I sometimes wear a pair of jeans or trousers for bits and parts of an entire week BEFORE sending it to the clothes hamper to be washed.

As I believe I have mentioned before, Mongolians have clothes washers, but very few have dryers. Here you hang your clean clothes on a rack to air dry. It's a dry climate and rarely takes more than half a day to dry most things. While I initially found this lifestyle habit to be odd (it was new to me!), it has become normal. I DO miss the feel of dryer-tightened jeans and SOFT fluffy towels. However, as a good friend told me, "A crunchy towel means you know it's clean!"

Yes, I've come to see that Americans are a little over-zealous with the cleaning habits. Both for clothing and for body. My guys are yet astonished that I shower EVERY day. This especially bothers my husband in the winter months and I have been repeatedly scolded for not allowing my bodily oils to congregate and protect me from infection and disease. I confess that every once in a while, I skip a day. This is always on a weekend. And I now generally wash my hair only every other day. And you know what, it's all very normal to me now. 

I wish I could say that I thought my clothing would last longer because they aren't being bumped around in a dryer. But the clothes washers here seem to be especially brutal on clothing!

I'll depart with this image, also taken on yesterday's sojourn, of a truck stacked high with hay which will help someone's herds makes it through the bitter months of cold that are imminent. I'm fairly confident that Mongolia does not have laws that stipulate the maximum height of stacking done on a truck!

Mongolian Habits to Adopt

In the countryside 

Sometimes I like to think about what aspects of the Mongolian lifestyle I would take home with me to the U.S. I don't yet know when that will be, but I know at some point I will relocate back to my home country. 

First, I LOVE that people take their shoes off at the entry door. I cringe when I reflect on all the years I walked IN SHOES throughout my homes/apartments ON CARPET. Oh...so nasty! Here, and I expect in most of Asia, you take your shoes off at the door. In my own apartment I wear slippers around and even offer extra slippers to visitors. Most people are comfortable moving around in their stocking feet. But I appreciate that this keeps my home CLEAN longer. If you think about it, our shoes go EVERYWHERE. They are covered in dirt, grime, oil and other auto fluids, and here in Mongolia, I know they are also coated in urine. Animal and human. Oh, and lots of concrete dust. So yes, I LOVE that we take our shoes off at the door. 

Secondly, I've noticed that upon entering the apartment the first thing that Zorig and Enji do is to wash their hands. My friend Doogii and her daughter Zaya did the same thing when they visited me. This makes sense because we've been outside riding on a public bus or a taxi and who knows what our hands have been touching. I've adopted this habit and plan to do it the rest of my life. It makes perfect sense. 

Thirdly, and I will have NO ability to make this change in the U.S., but I want to discuss it anyway. When you purchase electronics in Mongolia, you generally make payment to a cashier then take your receipt to the first floor (remember that Malls in Mongolia are built UP and not out) where you show your receipt. An employee goes to collect your appliance or electronic from storage and then they unpack it, plug it in, and show you that it functions. This ensures that you don't have to return the item. Granted, this means more work up front; but avoids that LONG line of returns at the front of Walmart. Strangely, it's proactive--which is not generally Mongolian imho! 

Additionally, because many of us are walking the item to our home, the employee creates a  handy-dandy handle from fat scotch tape so that it's easy to carry the item home. They do this free of charge, of course. I think it's brilliant!

There are certainly other habits or ways of life I'd like to take with me....but these are a few to get started with that I've been reflecting on recently. 

I'll end with this original store exterior that I happened by on the way to visit my in-laws recently. I love coming across random things like this on the streets of Ulaanbaatar. I confess that this week has shifted us into winter. It was cold and blustery for the last few days. The days are getting shorter. Now I look forward to Dec 20 and the shift to days getting longer again. While the cold is extreme and the pollution will get bad, it is the darkness that gets me down. But when the new year arrives, we'll be climbing out of the darkness. It's been a great week off for Fall Break. Back to work on Monday!! Cheers!

How the Army made me "Mongolia-Ready"

While walking home from work a couple weeks ago I was struck with a strange, but apt, realization--the military training I participated in when I was young (I joined when I was 17 years old and a junior in high school) prepared me for life in Mongolia! As I hoofed the three miles from school to the apartment, I started to make a mental list of all the skills or experiences that translated to this current life. I thought you might enjoy hearing about them. Here goes....

"Humping"

No...this is not a sexual reference! It means carrying everything you need with you (most often on one's back) and relying on your own two feet (aka black leather express) to get you anywhere and everywhere. This is 100% my life in Mongolia. Without a car to cart things around in, I rely on sturdy backpacks, super-strength plastic bags, and my own feet. I'm always humping something across town. This means I need GOOD footwear and good quality bags. Strangely the backpack I purchased at a high price a year and a half ago FOR the safari in South Africa has proved to be excellent! I remember scoffing at the price then--but was in a bind because the packing list said an OD green backpack was required and it was the ONLY one I could find in UB. It has proved to be a smart investment after all, getting daily use beyond that 10 day safari. 

Throwback Pic!

Cattle Trucks

As I used every core muscle in my body the other morning to hold myself erect on the crammed public bus, I had a mild flashback to being 17 years old, holding two heavy army duffel bags, and being yelled at by drill sergeants while we loaded ourselves onto "cattle trucks" to be transported to our home for eight weeks of Basic Training. While I love the convenience and low cost of riding the public bus here in UB (one ride is about 20 cents), in the morning it DOES feel like one is a sardine in an overstuffed can. While I expect buses have passenger limits for safety purposes, they are NOT observed here. If you can push your way onto the bus, then you can ride. We only ride about 4 km but it's a jerky ride as the driver responds to the crazy traffic and the stops in between. You work your core muscles as well as hold on for dear life trying desperately to NOT bang into the people around you. 

Mail is Awesome!

Mail call during Basic Training was a highlight and my family delivered in that department. My father wrote me a brief note EVERY DAY. I still have them. Occasionally he would slip in a leaf or pine needle to remind me of home. Getting mail from the "outside" world made it feel a little less foreign and alienating as life on a military installation does have a "bubble" feel to it. Life in UB is different than life in the U.S. though more and more Western conveniences and products are becoming available month by month. That said, it's yet LOVELY to go to the post office and find a card from a friend or my godmother, or best of all--a care package with treasures from my homeland. Recently this included a package with FITTED sheets as well as a package of Twizzlers and Reese's Peanut Butter cups. 

Hurry up and Wait!

I expect this aspect is true no matter where one is in the world. In the Army we were trained to rush to the Mess Hall for chow, only to have to wait in a long line to finally be served. We rushed to formation, only to wait for the slow-poke (Kirkpatrick!) that was ALWAYS sloppy late. And then we'd all be dropped to do push-ups as punishment for the lazy one. Yes, the Army taught me about forced patience. Here in Mongolia there is some of this--hurrying to the bus stop to have to wait longer than expected for the right line to show up (and that has room on it!). But Mongolians generally run on a different time clock. Recent example from a friend--she arrived for a physical therapy session at the appointed hour only to be told that the therapists weren't yet there. When they arrived, they said it was because of the rain. Now....this was a mild drizzle, not a torrential downpour. So yes, punctuality is NOT valued so much here. As expats we often refer to it as simply, "Mongolian time."

Camaraderie

Most of my fellow American Wife pals

After spending twelve years in the Army National Guard, I separated in 2003. It was the right decision at the time, but I'd be lying if I said it was a happy choice. The military creates a unique experience with what we call camaraderie. Before this time in my life, I had NEVER experienced camaraderie in the civilian world. In the Army it was about being thrown into unexpected situations, often unprepared, and with a hodge-podge of people from various walks of life, ages, backgrounds, and having to figure something out, make a plan, and survive to thrive. The women I served with were not high school classmates. They didn't know my family, my background, or really anything about who I was or wanted to be. But when you are exhausted from getting up to do fireguard at 1 am, then up again at 3:30 am for physical training, then later in the day have to hold hands of the woman next to you because she can't see because of the eyes-watering, nose-snotting, can't-breathe-because-of-gas-exposure-in-the-gas-chamber training exercise....well, you just learn to appreciate those beside you that have endured the same as you and helped when and if they could. 

I have a great camaraderie--what we choose to call solidarity--with my fellow American wives. While each of our relationships and families is uniquely ours, we have backgrounds that reflect one another and a shared, collective understanding about where we came from and the challenges and gifts that a life in Mongolia offers us. These amazing women are a huge part of my life and I am thankful for them--their honesty and compassion--each and every day. 

But...

I no longer sleep like a soldier! In the Army I could sleep anywhere, anytime. Shoot, while at Basic Training at Ft Leonard Wood, MO, we took turns sleeping on cold hard tiles in the tiny space behind our wall lockers. Yes, sleep was a precious commodity when training.  Between the early wake-ups, the endless days of training, and the shifts of fire guard in the middle of the night......one was perpetually exhausted. While I find myself tired for very different reasons in this modern life, I can no longer sleep anywhere. In fact, I have trouble sleeping in my own bed. In my 40s I find myself sensitive to light AND sound! And even when I stop drinking liquids before 8 PM, I still seem to need to get up twice in the night to use the restroom. I'm going to take the easy way out and blame it all on hormones and being female. I've done what I can....moving to a quieter apartment that is NOT in the central city zone AND hanging different coverings over the windows to create a blackout in the bedroom. But still, I don't sleep like I did as a soldier in the U.S. Army. 

One just never knows how previous roads traveled will impact current ones. I am forever grateful for my time in the military--the experiences it gave me at the time and how it built my ability to exercise resilience. Any thoughts to share on your previous-current path intersections? As always, thanks for reading. 

Minions, Margaritas, and MMMMM!

Summer camp Kiddos

Summer went by all too quickly as it always does. School ended on June 23rd, but I worked our English Summer Camp the two weeks that followed. I worked with the oldest group of students, most of them in the 9-12 years old group. Most of them are in this picture. While I do prefer working with adolescents and teens, I LOVED my two weeks with these students. They were excited to arrive each morning to see what was in store for them. Our theme for this year's camp was, "Every Hero has a Story." We read lots of stories and talked about what makes a person a hero. The weather was cold and rainy on our second field trip Thursday, so we went and saw Despicable Me 3. While I very much enjoyed the original movie, each sequel just gets sillier and sillier. But the kids always seem to love the minions!

Yummy Margaritas!

With summer camp finished, I boarded a jet plane for a speedy two weeks in the USA--all of it spent in Virginia with my mom and various friends and family members. First on the list of things to EAT/DRINK was Mexican. First night we had Mexican. Then we had it again the next night where mom and I enjoyed these HUGE margaritas. Thankfully, this restaurant was just across the street from mom's apartment. No worries about how to get home. While I had hoped we'd get to do Mexican a third time...frankly we ran out of time. AND there were so many other things to eat. McDonald's. Wendy's. Mozzarella sticks and marinara sauce (at a true Italian restaurant). Burgers and fries. Seafood. Breakfast at a diner. And we did manage to stay in a few nights where I enjoyed making either bologna and cheese sandwiches OR hotdogs and cheese sandwiches. I know...that will gross some of you out, I'm sure. While there seem to be sausages everywhere in UB, they are not the salty, tasty hot dogs of the USA. Yes, I'm sure they are filled with terrible-for-you things....but man, they sure taste good! 

Angela, Heather, & Me

Two of my best gal pals from high school journeyed down from Pennsylvania on Sunday to spend what was supposed to be a few hours together (and turned into an overnight crash session). I saw Heather five years ago during the time of our 20th high school reunion. But Ang, well....I can't exactly remember when I saw her last. Neither could she. But probably when we were yet IN high school. Anyway, these gals weren't only just MY high school friends, they were like family to my mom. We made the most of our 17 hours together. We TALKED, we ate, we drank, we told stories, and we drank some more. I wonder if my mother is yet telling the story about how we were all "cut off" by the bar at Chownings Tavern. We were getting a bit loud and rowdy, I think, though our server really liked us. :) We took it home to mom's apartment and continued on with Mongolian vodka. We shared no shortage of laughs and memories into the wee hours.

Fawn, Mel, & Me

The morning after this night of fun I began my four-day intensive Advanced Placement Summer Institute hosted at the College of William & Mary (a place i once fantasized of attending!). I've attended no shortage of teacher trainings and professional development opportunities across my 12+ years of working in the field of education. A few exceptional, some good, most less than mediocre (more often than not....those were mandated by a school or district!). For the FIRST time in my education career I was in a room with 25 educators and NOT ONE felt they needed to dominate every conversation or WOW the other attendees with their wisdom, insight, or experiences. It was a room full of professional educators, some seasoned, some brand new....but each of us with a true respect for the collaborative experience. My table of five shared everything and anything. It was AMAZING! After my participation in the National Writing Project, this summer institute was next best experience. 

Young TJ on the right...

Once the professional development was complete, then I headed into my final weekend of fun before I boarded a plan for Asia. I was blessed to have my sister Fawn (who came from ID) and cousin Melaney (who lives in MD) travel down to spend a fast and furious 48 hours together. We ate, drank, attended events at CW, and played games at nearly midnight. Fawn and I even managed to meet up and exercise in the morning. Okay...that may be stretching the truth. We planned to run, but found walking and talking in the humidity to be more than sufficient. 

After we Escaped the King

We attended a couple of events during the day at CW (heard the Young Thomas Jefferson speak) and went to Escape the King on Saturday night along with our cousin Roz. I'm proud to say....WE DID ESCAPE. Are you kidding? All of us crazy smart people trapped in a room.....with a few random strangers and children? Yes, we managed just fine!

The weekend raced by us in a fury. Over the two weeks I shopped like a madwoman...acquiring things for myself, for my son and husband, and for the in-laws. I arrived with ONE bag (probably about 38 lbs); and I returned with TWO 50 lbs bags (I had been smart enough to pack a second). I confess that a good many of those pounds were books I received at the training OR during the numerous trips that Mom and I made to Barnes and Noble. I can't express how much I miss a LARGE bookstore. 

Home-cooked Meal

My final night was spent in Hampton VA at my cousin Roz's beautiful home. You may be shocked to learn....this was my first and ONLY home-cooked meal across the entire two weeks in the USA. Even I admit that's appalling in retrospect. BUT...I can tell you it was totally WORTH it. First we enjoyed cocktails with a tour of the garden and grounds. then some YUMMY cheeses with grapes. And finally, pork tender loin from the grill. Homemade pesto on pasta. And roasted brussel sprouts. I know I ate more than I should have....but I was in heaven (and knew I was leaving in a few short hours). It was a lovely evening spent with two people whom I adore...my mother and Roz. They support me while I live this life abroad and it wouldn't be possible without them. 

I wrapped up summer with just over three weeks in UB preparing to begin teaching the AP Literature & Comp course for the first time. I'm excited to report that I have 9 of our 21 seniors in the class and I look forward to our 85 minutes together each and every morning. More soon!

Sheep Heads and Sidewalk Sleepers

I'm still surprised when I see sheep heads--cooked and saran-wrapped--in the cooler next to the eggs and milk at the supermarket. I just can't imagine it will ever be normal or everyday. But here they are for your viewing pleasure. And one head costs 5,540 MNT or about $2.28. If you've been following my blog, then you recall that I tried my first sheep's head back in April of 2016. I haven't had it again since. I'm glad to have tasted it....and the cheek meat and tongue are especially tasty...but it's not preferred Mongolian meat. That would be horse! With winter approaching, horse meat will be back on the butcher blocks. For the most part it is not eaten in the warmer months. 

Some of you may have been wondering where I've been....as it's been a near two month hiatus since I last posted. Summer came and I was busy--first with working the English summer camp at ASU (had a blast with the younger kids for two weeks!). Then I went home to the USA, Virginia to be exact, to see my mother (and other family and friends--a full post on that soon) and attend an Advanced Placement Summer Institute. Then I was back here in UB for the final weeks before I first reported to work on August 18th. Now we are into our second full week of the semester one and I am LOVING my AP Lit class that is populated with NINE of our seniors (about half of the class). Again....look for a fleshed out post soon with highlights from my US trip.

My last post back in July was about Sidewalks....the uneven-ness of them and the things I observe on them. Well...this is a P.S. to that post. Occasionally one does encounter someone such as this man on the left. He was sound asleep on the sidewalk. I assume he had been drunk, though I can't say I smelled any alcohol. I snapped this picture around 9:20 am on a Sunday morning--I think I was on my way home after a morning jog. Anyway....just wanted to add that one more thing to my observations for the sidewalks of UB. 

I promise to have another post up very soon! 

Sidewalk Stories

Tuul River full after rains

I spend a lot of time on the sidewalks of Ulaanbaatar. When the weather is good, I often walk the 5 km or 3 mi from ASU to our home. I walk to grocery shop and let's get real, when you don't have a car trunk to fill and transport with, it can take multiple trips. I walk or run for exercise in the early morning and I walk to hunt for new restaurants or shops and to just plain be outside and moving around. I've never been much of a homebody and 75 square meters (800 sq feet) can seem small with three people living in it. So....I walk the sidewalks of the city. 

Disrepair

I had an earlier post about the sidewalks of UB in which I talked about how most of them have a combination of two types of blocks/bricks. Some are like cobblestone. Compared to sidewalks in America, Mongolia's can seem like an obstacle course. Because they are not made of a continuous pouring of concrete, they fall into disrepair and have to be redone periodically. You may walk home one day on a disintegrating sidewalk, and the next day it's been torn up completely. If they aren't also messing with the lines underneath (water? electricity? I don't know!), then you might have a completely NEW sidewalk two days later. They are speedy about it! 

Diversity of blocks/bricks

But this is NOT the place where you can walk and not keep an eye on your footfalls. You could end up jarring yourself with an unexpected drop, or catch your toe on a block gone askew, or simply trip up on a different material. I imagine if these types of sidewalks were discovered in America someone would be on the phone complaining in no time. I admit that it sometimes annoys me. However, I've found the silver lining. Navigating the sidewalks of my city keeps my core muscles strong. Walking on smooth pavement or concrete requires no work from our smaller leg muscles and certainly not our core to maintain our balance. Well, it's the opposite here. I get plenty of practice on maintaining footholds, stepping over obstacles (remember about the manholes!), and holding my core tight and sound. 

While walking or jogging in the early morning hours the sidewalks reveal tales of the UB night life that aren't so pretty. If you are eating while reading this, I'd pause at this point and come back when you are finished. I don't mean to offend anyone, but what I share next initially shocked/disturbed me, but now it has become common and normal to observe.

If I walk to the bus stop or go for a morning jog I almost always encounter two specific kinds of evidence that share about the evening before. On a Saturday or Sunday morning, I normally count between one and five vomit splatters. Yes, I am for real. Sometimes they are surrounded by birds picking at the bits. Gross. I know. But hey, it's already been regurgitated, I guess. I've certainly had nights where I drank too much and had to expel the poison. However, I feel I was more often home at that point and not out on the streets. And to be honest, maybe this is common experience for anyone living in a big city. Before moving to UB, I always lived in the suburbs.

Additionally, I sometimes observe drops of blood on the sidewalks of UB. With the dry air and climate here it IS possible that they could be from spontaneous nose bleeds. However, I've observed numerous scuffles and fights--outside restaurants and bars, on the sidewalk, and even at 6 am between a small group of taxi drivers. So I suspect that the blood drops I find are from physical fights. Mongolian men do tend to like to solve their problems with their hands if/when their words do not get the result they desire. Again, maybe the streets of Chicago or New York or Los Angeles would reveal much of the same evidence of what happens in the midnight hours. I only have my experience in Ulaanbaatar to draw from. If you have lived in or currently live in a large city, please comment below and tell me if you've found the same evidence or not. What do the sidewalks of your city reveal about it or about its people or culture? 

Eve of Presidential Election

Tomorrow Mongolians will elect their fifth president. Here are the three candidates, from left to right: Enkhbold (Mongolian People's Party), Battulga (Democratic Party), and Ganbaatar (Mongolian People's Revolutionary Party). I'm not informed well enough to give much information about any of them. I'll only say that most Mongolians seem to think or feel that each of the candidates is corrupted in some way and will not be strong enough to create the Mongolia that so many of them wish for and want. 

What I will comment on is the duration of the election season. Signs and advertisements starting going up just after the first of June. I read there was a presidential debate last night on TV (initially was supposed to be one a little over a week ago--but it got canceled). The election is tomorrow. That's less than a month spent on serious campaigning. While I'd argue that may not be enough time, it's certainly preferable to the YEARS of campaigning that happen in the U.S. The mayor of UB has declared the next two days as alcohol free and has prohibited public events. 

Friday marked the end of my second school year at ASU. However, I'm working our summer camp which starts tomorrow and runs for two weeks. We have nearly 40 students ages 6-13 and will spend five hours each day with them. Our theme this year is: Every Hero has a Story! I'll be starting with Sendak's Where the Wild Things Are and have a variety of fun activities plan for the two weeks. We take a field trip one day each week as well. After summer camp I'll be heading home to the US for a quick visit to see my mom and to attend an AP Summer Institute. Summer is already passing TOO FAST!

Sorry for the silence on my blog lately. I have a number of topics I want to discuss and hope to be posting more very soon. Hope each of you is enjoying your summer!

Expat Exercise Challenges

10,000 steps a day is easy!

I remember hearing people complain about the "over 40 metabolism slowdown" when I was younger. Now it's happening and it's no fun. According to this article by on Huffington Post, it has to do with changes in hormones, loss of muscle mass, and insulin resistance. Whatever it is, I don't like it. Diet and exercise continue to be the frustrating components of living life as an expat. The last few years I lived in Colorado Springs, I attended a CrossFit gym and ate a primarily Paleo diet. Believe it or not, I got up at 4:30 am, did the 5 AM WOD, then it was home, shower, and off to work. I loved knocking out my workout first thing in the morning. I was feeling and looking good.

With spring/summer in the air, I'm getting back into working out more regularly. By the nature of how much I walk as a part of my average day, I do get my 10,000 steps/day easily. Most days I'm in the 12,000 to 15,000 step range. With the weather improving, I enjoy walking home from work (5k/3 miles). But I have been riding the exercise roller coaster since arrival. When it's so dark and cold in the winter time--motivation can be tough to scrounge up. There are a few aspects that contribute to the up and down experience, the on-the-wagon, off-the-wagon reality of making/keeping exercise a part of my every day life. 

• Location and Accessibility.
  I'd LOVE to go to a gym, but without a car (which I do NOT want to acquire, nor do I want to drive in UB) it limits my options. I'd LOVE to have "Crossfit UB" within a 10 minute walk from my apartment. I'd be willing to pay a solid membership fee for that kind of workout and having it close to home. Of course I'd want a qualified trainer/coach employed at said Box. But alas, Crossfit hasn't officially made it to UB yet. I *could* use the gym at my school. It has weights and cardio machines, a gymnasium, mats, everything really. But I am deterred by the need to lug around shower stuff and/or a change of clothing. I already carry a steady backpack to and from work for everyday necessities. I don't want to shower and get ready AT school, and traveling home sweaty and gross doesn't appeal to me either. (I know....these are MY choices!) SO.....I've settled for working out in my apartment.

• Time of Day.
  I prefer to work out in the morning. Starting a day with a workout is ideal for my body and spirit. It kick starts my muscles and metabolism and there is something exceptional about knowing you've already checked that item off one's list. However, because I live in a 75 sq. meter apartment (about 800 sq. feet) with only two rooms that offer enough space to work out--both of which are bedrooms--I can't workout before school as it would disturb my husband and son's sleep. Therefore, I have to force myself to work out in the evening. Not ideal for me, but as they say, you make time for what's important. And a workout anytime of day is better than NO workout at all. 

• Equipment.
  One has two options: (a) join a gym where the equipment is provided, or (b) purchase/supply your own equipment to create a home gym. I came with a few things--exercise mat, jumprope, resistance band, workout clothing. Since arrival I've added weights as I LOVE strength training. As a woman, this is important towards maintaining muscle mass and to keeping my bones strong as I age. I absolutely love having sore quads and hamstrings from doing squats and lunges! In the beginning, I could only find 1-10 lb dumbbells. Then they jumped pretty drastically, from 10 to 15 to 20. As a woman, I need smaller increments. When we came back from our holiday visit to the U.S. I brought home my big investment--a set of PowerBlock adjustable dumbbells. Together they weighed 50 lbs. I had to divide them up, placing a few parts in each of our 6 bags. One of them I transported in my carry-on. You should have seen the security personnel in the Beijing airport inspecting that!! Hilarious. BUT.....these are a brilliant investment. I'm so glad I bought them and worked out how to get them here. 

From 3 to 24 lbs in 3 lb increments. Brilliant!!

• Trainer and/or Workout program.Since I'm not attending a Crossfit gym where a trainer/coach decides and guides the day's workout, I have to make or find my own. I have some books on weightlifting and brought some DVD programs as well. However, in this era of streaming online media, I've grown to use and love FitnessBlender. They offer hundreds of free, online workouts. Stand alone, 5 day challenges, or multi-week plans with a focus (strength, fat loss, flexibility, etc). I've also become a fan of Yoga with Adrienne. Yoga can be surprisingly difficult. I struggle to clear my mind during these sessions--doesn't help that I'm watching intensely trying to figure out the moves--but I do feel that my muscles get a serious workout even if I'm not huffing and puffing at the end. :)

I try to workout 3-5 times a week. On the weekends I sometimes go for a run in the morning when the air is yet cool. I usually do a 3 mile loop, from home to the Wrestling Palace (where I do step-ups and squats) and then around the Square on the way home. I wish I could run dirt trails (I so miss the Fountain Valley Regional Trail system!) and they do exist, but then there is the transportation issue to tackle. So I find a way to work with I got! Urban running it is! 

As for diet, that's a whole other conversation. One would think that with Mongolia's obsession with MEAT it would be easy to be Paleo. It is, and it isn't. They do have lots of meat. However, it's often tough and hidden by a crapload of wheat (NOT paleo) in some form. Mongolia is known for two food groups--meat and dairy. Dairy is NOT Paleo. So this is another on-again, off-again battle--trying to eat Paleo in a land that puts LOADS of refined carbs and often gluten in every dish (rice, noodles, bread, etc). Bottom line...you have to shop around and do lots of planning. 

I'll wrap this up for now. Time to get outside for a walk in the 70+ degree sunshine to get my vitamin D allotment. :)

Can't see the Trees for the Concrete

October 2015, Bank of Chuluut River

As the daughter of a forester, I notice trees. I grew up in the Northwoods of Michigan--our favorite tree to climb was a White Pine on the edge of the field behind our house in the middle of the Pigeon River Country State Forest. I love the smell of evergreen, the vibrant green of a deciduous tree, and the flow of a willow blowing in the wind. I even like the enchanting look of a saguaro cactus in the desert land of the southwest. If you were to flip through my pictures from trips over the years, you'd find a strange assortment of pictures of trees. Yes, that's all, just unique or cool looking trees. I can't explain why I am driven to take them. They touch or speak to something instinctual inside me. They make me feel at ease, at home. 

Tree implanted for ASEM last summer

That said, I want to appreciate the efforts around UB to increase the greenery despite our very short growing season. If I remember correctly, things didn't green-up last year until JUNE. I'm not joking. It took forever to feel surrounded by green; and when it did happen, it was an overnight experience. As if a magician flew over our sprawling metropolis one night and said, "let there be green!" And so it was. 

But I have a serious problem with whomever thinks that trees--some of which are fairly mature--can be planted inside a field of concrete and expect them to flourish and thrive. In the picture to the left you see a large evergreen (I suspect it's a pine of some sort) that was implanted (arrived at the size you see) last summer just before the ASEM Summit. As you can see, there are boards to support them. I assume because we are yet waiting for their roots to take anchor. The supports have been there since installation. Not exactly a beautiful sight--TALL live trees with dead trees holding them up. But worse than this, I want you to see what it looks like where the tree meets the ground. 

The resolution may not be ideal, but I think you can see my point in this picture (right). There is literally NO exposed land around where the tree meets the ground. It is boxed in completely by huge blocks of marble. IF the tree manages to stay alive (questionable), there is no room for it to grow and expand. Well, at least not without breaking up the sidewalk that encases it. I'm left to wonder if the planners of this space (and many others) ever pause to get educated by anyone that knows about trees. How does one go about watering this tree? (I'm confident there is NOT an under-the-marble sprinkler system!) And how in the world is wood springing forth from marble or concrete felt to be beautiful or appealing? Mongolians are known to have a deep affinity for their nature. You can't flip through the channels on cable TV here without catching a Mongolian singer--male and female--decked out in a deel and singing from a forest, a mountaintop, or from the wide open steppe. Everyone looks forward to escapes to the countryside and you will see families or groups of friends sitting on a blanket in the middle of the wide open expanses that surround UB and every other town or city, talking, eating, playing. So I know they love their land (trash is another problem and for another post). I wish we could employ the foresters and landscape architects that KNOW how we could actually have trees flourish in our city. 

Here's another attempt. There is a *small* quadrant of dirt around this one. However, I'm confident it is not living anymore. I didn't bother to take a picture of the actual treetop. It was too sad. 

Sometimes it's difficult to discern if a city tree is living or not. They look almost black in the winter months (basically Nov to March). I'm left to believe that is a byproduct of all the coal smoke/pollution in the air. It makes our snow gray and if the HEPA filter in my apartment is any indicator, yes, the pollution makes our trees black. I can't remember...is there a scene in the Lorax where all the trees go black? For some reason that movie comes to mind.

All that to say, I would love for there to be more trees around UB. I'd love for there to be more green spaces. I miss having a natural space to escape to and feel more at ease. And I agree that in modern times people are beginning to suffer from what has been coined "Nature Deficit Disorder." You can investigate that more by checking out this NPR story or the book that it references (which I read years ago with my fellow book club members back in Colorado). So....can someone please help UB plant trees in a way that will actually allow them to grow and thrive? There are people around the world that know what species would do best in our conditions, and how to make it possible. Not just a random shot through the concrete. 

Most of my readers here are also connected with me on Facebook. However, I know I have a few friends and family members that do not want to be in that social media realm. This last week the story of how Zorig and I met was featured in the New York Times' Travel Section, their first ever Love Issue. A friend of my sister sent her the form link, which my sister then sent to me. I figured, Why not? It had a 500 word limit which was tough, but a good challenge. It was an honor to be one of the six entries they published from the prompt/topic. I was moved by all six of them--they were diverse and unique. I'm still wanting to know more about the woman in Paris!! It tickled me that they chose my piece to highlight (See image at Left--quote from me, and opting to use the picture of a ger) when they posted to Facebook. Thanks NYT for sharing my story with a larger world. Love is about both joy and heartbreak. Timing is crucial. Decisions and choices have to be made. Sacrifices are often given. But we must keep the hope of love alive and that is always my wish in sharing our story. 

As always, thanks for reading. 

After the Carriage stopped....

Some thought I was abandoning a (good though) not-so-exciting life/marriage in pursuit of a Cinderella story when I left the U.S. for Mongolia. Much of what I post perpetuates that fairy tale--and yes, I felt and yet feel that how Zorig and I began and came to be was a fairy tale. But now I've been living abroad for nearly two years. I expect some of you would like to know about the other side of the scales. Most of what people post via social media is the highlight reel of life (perhaps interspersed with an occasional rant or rage about something). Perhaps you've wondered......What about the bad days? What's been hard? What sucks about living there? Don't you miss the U.S.? Your family and friends? Is your life still the fantasy it seemed you were going after? 

I don't know that I'll answer all of that here, but I would like to offer up some anecdotes to share the bloopers or misses in this life of living abroad with my foreign husband and son. You see....I'll forever be a foreigner to them; and they will always be foreigners to me. 

Zorig sometimes asks me, "Do you ever wonder, what am I doing here?" So let me start with an answer to that and then journey down a rabbit hole or two. 

In all honesty, I do sometimes wonder at the circuitous life route that put me here, in Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia, in the year of 2017, married to an Asian, a Mongolian man, and mother to a teenage Mongolian stepson. I could not have predicted this reality. So wonder at it? Yes, I do. 

There are hard days. Hard moments. Disagreeing with your spouse or partner is hard no matter what, but add to that reality the fact that you either sold or free-cycled 90% of your belongings and moved around the globe to be with that partner--and yes, the ante is upped. Things feel magnified. Amplified. 

Of course Zorig and I fight or disagree. Not often, but often enough for me. And when that happens a little voice inside me is fearful and says, "uh oh, what if this is it? what if he decides he doesn't want you anymore? Decides having a foreign wife is too difficult?" I guess that shares my insecurity and fears. :)

Relationships fall apart all the time. Mine did in the U.S. But then I had plenty of friends and family around to help me through the falling apart and breaking down of things. I was in a system I knew and understood. It can be scary to imagine doing all of that--HERE. But I have gone through the mental exercise (while in the middle of one of those uh oh moments). I know that I'd be fine. I have friends who would help and support me. If I HAD to go through that terrible outcome. I know that I'd stay. At least into the foreseeable future. I like living in Mongolia. I like not living in the U.S. Being an expat is freeing in many ways. [Though I continue to miss salted butter and sharp cheddar cheese!]

The butter I smuggled home from China LOL

I also imagine people asking....well then, was it worth it? Moving around the world and giving up everything you had? Absolutely. Yes! If Zorig and I ended, for whatever reason, I would be forever thankful to have had GREAT love for the time that we shared it. I intend to share it into old age....but as a friend recently commented, Great Love--no matter if it was shared for days or years--is an incredible feeling and experience. It supersedes any job, accomplishment, belonging, position, or piles of money one could ever acquire (except perhaps having your own children--I can't speak to that). I have no regrets about moving to Mongolia and pursuing this love and this life. I would not go back to my previous life for any amount of money or wishes granted. 

So now that we have that clear, let's talk about the hard stuff. 

It's hard to fight and disagree with a partner that sees and knows the world through a completely different history and lens. It takes a lot of acceptance and unconditional love to just let another person BE who they are. I'm learning how to do that now--in my 40s. My previous relationships probably would have benefited from my doing that....and in my receiving of the same. But I wasn't there yet, and neither were my partners. Z and I hiccup through this process. Some days and weeks are better than others. We fall down sometimes. Have to make amends and work at being better. But we do it. The magic that drew us together and caused us to pursue this life together is yet strong and potent--it covers all things. 

It's difficult to be a mom without the years of training--which for most begin in the womb. I screw up and hurt Enji's feelings sometimes. I'm short with him and cold at times. I hate it when I do it. But once I see what I've done, I apologize and take ownership of my shortcoming or my failure. A pivotal exchange happened in the fall when we had a misunderstanding and he said, "I'm sorry, I'm not used to having a mom." To which I replied, "No, I'm sorry, I'm not used to having a son....but we'll figure this out together." And we do and are. He is a fine young man--compassionate, patient, thoughtful. He makes me a better human being and I enjoy his company. Our conversations are delightful (most of the time--I can only talk about what superpowers I would choose so many times!). That said, it's annoying to have to collect his technology and make sure he gets to bed at a reasonable hour, and eats enough, and focuses on school work, and stops watching silly videos on youtube instead of doing math problems. Yes, it was simpler when I was not responsible for a young soul. But it was also less fruitful. :) To see his grades improve and watch him achieve accolades is worth any annoyance. 

It's both easier and harder to make friends living abroad. Expats stand out so obviously here that we spot one another everywhere. However, expats are also part of a fairly transient group. At my school teachers sign a two-year contract and perhaps--if they can endure the pollution--might renew for a third. But generally they move on to another pasture after their initial contract. Of course one can still be friends....but not geographically together for very long. These friendships seem to stay in the shallow end of the pool. The young people want to party and experience all they can in their short time here and then move on. The single people beyond the young party crowd are doing their own thing, some of them hunting for their mate, some toggling between the groups (but less inclined to hang with those of us married and in a familial living situation). The Christians are plugged into their churches and respective communities. 

I am blessed with my circle of fellow American Wives. They are the ones I know I could count on if dire circumstances were to come my way. As well as being the ones to celebrate accomplishments or successes. We have our private Facebook group and it is a place of solidarity and trust. I visit it every day. However, most of them have small children which makes me feel a bit like an outsider. They accept and include me in everything--but I lack common experiences and that makes me feel as though I'm not fully in the group in some strange way (I fully understand this is my feeling....nothing they do). 

I sometimes long for closer, tighter friendships. I've had many over the years and do what I can to maintain them from afar (hoping to someday resume them geographically). I had my first "best friends" in elementary school. My oldest friend that was my BF for many years is married to my brother. We always seem to pick right up where we left off when we meet in person and in our virtual communications we cut to the chase. We have the history and foundation to do that. Over the years, and changes in career and geography, I've had many best friends. Opening up oneself to that kind of trust and vulnerability is powerful. Supporting/assisting one another through the trials and adventures of life is a great responsibility, and a greater joy. I have one close Mongolian girlfriend whom I adore. Despite our different cultures, we get one another and it's lovely. 

There are other frustrating or saddening things--but they are all on the smaller scale. For example, having small appliances and not being able to find the ingredients one wants to make the dishes one loves (my sweet Mexican cornbread!). Being so far from parents and siblings can be frustrating. Instead of spending hundreds to visit/see them...its more like 2K or more. Communicating with the time difference can make organic conversation difficult. Not having as much contact as I'd like with stateside friends makes me sad sometimes. I miss having a Crossfit gym and a dirt trail to run on. I miss having closets and being able to hang pictures (easily) on the wall (it's concrete here and not drywall). I miss Mexican food. But now we're just getting into inane details and complaints.

All in all, my life is good and satisfying. I love my husband and my son. I love the family we've cobbled together from differing pasts. My work is meaningful and inspiring. There are no guarantees about the future, but I can't imagine ever regretting the decision to move here and forge an unpredicted path in life. I have learned so much about myself and the world. I'm yet learning. But then that's at the core of who I am....I am a learner. 

So I guess you could say that I climbed out of the carriage and though life is not a happily ever after for anyone, I do find myself in a "happy now" most parts of every day. I'm content with that.