Thursday, January 15, 2015

This Wicked Roller Coaster Ride

While I began to think and dream of a life in Mongolia back in September, it has become real for me in a new way this past week as I shared my plans with my bosses and some co-workers. 

Me in Hustai National Park
No one is quite sure what to say to, "I'm moving to Mongolia." And who can blame them? People up and move to California, or Pennsylvania, or even Florida. But Mongolia? I suspect some Americans aren't even sure where to locate Mongolia on a map, let alone make it home. But in about 167 days I will pack my few remaining belongings and board a plane to cross the Pacific and begin the next chapter of my life.

While I would say I am not a traditional female with emotions that swing in huge ways, this fall and winter have allowed me to ride a roller coaster of feelings and emotions. First there was the falling in love with a man that was 6,000 miles and an ocean away. It didn't happen all at once, but rather over some days and weeks in which we began to know one another on a deeper level. For me, it was the fact that he was honest and forthright in all things. Whatever he felt or thought, he said. No hesitation. No games. No masks. No, "if I say this, she will think that, and then what?" No chess game to manipulate or control. Just honest, raw truth and candor. And so I fell in love. He is the man I've waited my whole life for......

Then came the real problem....where to make a life together. He made plans to visit me in USA over the Christmas holiday. We called this "Stage 2" of the relationship; Stage 1 being the six days we spent together on the fishing trip. Stage 3 would be my summer 2015 visit and Stage 4 was what came afterwards. However, some time in October the stages disappeared into the ether. I would move to UB (short for Ulaanbaatar, the capital city) in summer of 2015 and our life together would begin.  Some have asked why he doesn't come to the US. All I can say is that I knew in my gut and heart that him coming to my country would slowly kill off the strong spirit I so love and admire in him. He can't do all that he is accustomed to doing in Mongolia, in the US. I think my job skills and experience are more adaptable there. And so I go. I know in every fiber of my being that this is the right choice for us, the right way for us to pursue a life of love and adventure together. I will become his wife and a mother to his teenage son. I will learn a second language (Mongolian). 

Throughout the fall, I would walk across my school campus and ponder the fact that this *could* be my last autumn in America. It was a thought that brought on feelings of both excitement for the unknown and melancholy at that which will be lost, left behind. Nowadays, with the decision made and this new future imminent, my feelings oscillate momentarily from excitement to fear. It is, I think, simply the nature of making such a huge and overwhelming change to one's life. It is not a ride that can be avoided, nor can I get off of it. I will be on it until I arrive in UB in July. And so I spend my days learning to embrace the curves, the jerks, the loops, and the moments when my stomach drops out. In each of those moments one thing always rises to the surface--I am alive and living life to the fullest. 

This is the space in which I hope to keep track of my journey. I hope you might join me along the way and share your comments and thoughts when you want. I am blessed with an amazing family and a host of incredible friends. Thank goodness for technology that we may all stay in contact as time marches on.

9 comments:

  1. I cannot wait to read about your adventures as you begin this new chapter in life!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Alex! I think it's going to be quite a ride.

      Delete
  2. So glad you will be blogging as you continue your journey in Mongolia. Love you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Sara! It's a story worth documenting....I think. :)

      Delete
  3. Wow! So exciting. I'm looking forward to following your adventure here.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I will be so glad to have you along for the ride. Let's get together later this spring for coffee!!

      Delete
  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Wow, Heather! You are an inspiration! Btw - your blog was recommended to me by Jari Sims.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. KP....Thanks! Happy to have you stop in for a musing of mine. :)

      Delete