Thursday, February 12, 2015

Wanting to be Better

This morning's musing will be short and sweet. Take a moment and refresh your memory of this scene from As Good as it Gets:

I remember this movie and the scene and being moved by it back in 1997 when it came out (and I was a young 23 yo!). I mean, what's better than a person admitting their shortcomings or vulnerabilities and wanting to overcome them or make personal changes. However, it wasn't until I met and fell in love with Zorig that I truly understood the feeling that Nicholson's character is expressing here. 

I watched Z look after my mother while we were in Idaho, making sure she had snacks within her reach and restocking her supply when necessary.

  • This made me want to be less self-centered, less selfish. Or perhaps the better goal is to be more aware of others needs than my own. I've become strangely aware of how self-focused I have lived my life until now. 

I heard Z say, "let's not talk about it anymore," and then effectively drop a disagreement/conversation that was going nowhere, or what was ultimately a cultural misunderstanding that got us stuck in some impasse. But then.....he really and truly DROPPED IT. (We would return to it later if it was a cultural issue and while we can't always relate, we both worked to understand.)

  • This made me wonder why I push so hard to complete certain conversations or disagreements. Ultimately, it is either to (a) be right or (b) to convert someone to my point of view (which is really just a different way of saying a, isn't it?). 
I would be lying in bed and going to sleep (since I had to get up and go to work), when I would randomly get a facebook message from Z, who was a  hallway away that simply said, "Thank you." When I asked, "for what?" He replied simply, "for all things." And I felt loved and SEEN. I felt that I mattered and that we were connected.

  • This made me recognize how little we take the time or make the effort to appreciate people for the little or big things they do for us. It takes no more than a few seconds to say it or a couple of minutes to write a card. I suppose this is an extension of my first point......getting outside oneself to validate others. I want to do it more!
I could go on......but you get the point. This man makes me want to be a better woman, a better human being. I want to spend more time appreciating and valuing and recognizing others for what they bring to my life or the world at large. Ultimately, I want to be better because I never want to stop winning his heart. He brings things out of me that I didn't know were there, OR they've been dormant for a very long time. It's time to awake from hibernation and go forth into the world with grace and gratitude. 

Who has made you want to be a better person? And what attributes or characteristics are you looking to develop?

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